Jump to content
simalarion

My wife just said she would leave me if i bought 1 more kit

Recommended Posts

5 hours ago, SupraChrgd82 said:

I’m gonna twist the knife....

God - be careful or by the end of the day someone’s gonna try and get the internet banned :(

JJ

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I believe main problem is different countries and how humour is picked up, as British Humour is very simillar to Norwegian (probably becouse we learned to love British humour trough TV growing up), but also in this Social media times specially young ppl get very easy offended and not even on their behalf but  on others behalf, thats how political correct it can be on many forums today.

In this post i think its obvious that this was only meant as humour and yes i was just playing with words so there is no truth in it what so ever, it was ment as a relief in this covid-19 times. And for the most i felt like this was cathed up straight away so i did not have to actully explain that, and since the base of this forum seems to be from U.K i thought it was safe, even for today standard when so many want to be offenden on behalf of others and also be 100% political correct at all time as i mentioned, so i still thougth this was safe and harmless. For my part i understood right away that all here just shared their own story with iaFunny twist and was also setting their story on the egde for the humor of it (often very British humour), i did not at any point think they where hostile to womens in general or wanted to keep females away from forum, on the other hand some stated that they liked to clean and Cook for themselfes so i read it more like they where independent now (and enjoy what before where looked as at "womens" work) and proud of it, and that is actually poilitical correct even for todays standard. 

My trye story is that my wife is a scientist with Phd (and so on) and work all the time, she have much more money then i have , she also do not care what i do with my money as long as i pay my part in this family ofc (so pretty much the same as dannymulder)... my true story is also dead boring

  • Like 5

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Very well said @simalarion

I'd also like to clarify that I absolutely adore my wife - we've been married for 20 years and had cr*p thrown at us by life practically since day one - but it's made us stronger and I couldn't imagine my life without her.

With my comments I was purely joking about how my wife genuinely pretends to go for the door handle in the car if I start talking about RC stuff. She will admit straight away she has zero interest in it. But that's fine! She's happy for me to go and spend a few hours at the weekend in the garage or out at the park enjoying my hobby because she knows I enjoy it and it's therapeutic for me. She loves shopping for homeware and clothes - I admit straight away too that I have zero interest in that, but again, I don't care if she wants to do that if she enjoys it. She actually tends to feel more guilty about it than me - often saying "tell me to stop...." but as we both tell each other - we have our own budgets for our own interests that are after all the bills etc are paid  - as long as we don't go into debt, what we do with it doesn't matter.

The last thing I would ever do is be derogatory about my wife or any woman, especially in a public forum.

  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@jonboy1 also to be fair very very few persons are making this thread into somthing it aint, seems most off the forum members get this and want to play along with similar humour, i fo my part need this in these **** Covid-19 times! that never seems to end in Oslo. And to have a Forum that you can both share and get help with your hobby is Golden for me in these times, and! if we also can have a laugh togheter from time to time with a bit off RC related humour its even better, that was my intention with this post and i believe as it was with the others that shared their story.

So its Great! to have this plattform during these times with very helpfull and kind ppl, so thanks all for that :),

I think the few that did not get the intention of the post has got this explained good several times now, so lets go back to having some Fun!.

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Agreed :)

So, in other news, I've just spent over £100 in about 10 minutes on vintage parts to make one of my shelf queens ever so slightly box fresh looking....:rolleyes::P

  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
3 minutes ago, jonboy1 said:

Agreed :)

So, in other news, I've just spent over £100 in about 10 minutes on vintage parts to make one of my shelf queens ever so slightly box fresh looking....:rolleyes::P

My wife actually went to Local RC store and got me seriously bling bling Top-Force Hop-Up dampers for Christmas, i did just recently install them.

So then ofc i was looking at these bling bling dampers for Agrios that they had in stock at-Tamico for 100GBP, i was so close to buying but then i found out i needed 2x as Agrios need 8 oil dampers and the set had 4. Luckely they are not in stock anymore, i think that is for the best ;)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

How utterly predictable, and sad.

But hey, don't let me ruin the party. You're just helping to prove my point.

I thought Tamiyaclub was a different kind of place, but now I see the true colors.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Actually i have no idea what your actuall point is (if its anything clear at all upp in all this) and i do not want to know anymore because to be honest i believe the real problem here is that you are depressed more than anything else.

So i suggest then you rather spend more time where those colours suits you better, so pretty please (again) just move on 

Edit: Im just asking you to look away from this post that you made your point about is not to your liking, i will not in any way let this effect other posts and i will still trye to help you in others posts when i can :)

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
50 minutes ago, simalarion said:

Actually i have no idea what your actuall point is (if its anything clear at all upp in all this) and i do not want to know anymore

Apparently this needs to be spelled out for you.

Just because a group of people don't comment on these forums doesn't mean they don't read them.

You all seem to think that this is your own little bubble and you can say whatever you want about whoever you want. (It's not.)

My point is that you are disparaging "wives" as a group (women, by extension) with the simple existence of this thread.

Then you are attempting to defend and cover that up with flat attempts at "humour" and "get back to topic".

The topic was flawed from the start.

If you have felt the need to respond to my comments, perhaps you should ask yourself WHY you are so quick to defend bullying, of any sort.

What does my age, mental state, or place of origin have to do with my comments here? NOTHING. Yet many of you have disparaged ME in those ways as well.

Just as I said yesterday. The mob mentality of the thread has taken over.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The one point that seems to have been largely overlooked here (apart from a mention on the previous page) is that using the relationship as a weapon is an unpleasant form of manipulation and suggests that one party puts higher value on the relationship than the other.  That's got to be grounds for either imminent relationship failure, or the horror of being stuck on a long-term toxic relationship with someone who thinks they can hold that kind of power over the other.  That is disrespect of a very high order and I'm thankful I've never been in the position to have to say "well, if that's how you feel, there's the door" - because I seriously wouldn't stick around if I was told that the relationship was worth less than a cardboard box with a toy car in it.

Now it appears the OP actually made the thread as a joke but it might as well not have been.  And would any of us have responded any different if Simalariette had posted "my husband just said if I buy one more kit he'll leave me - so I bought three more!"  I think most of us would have chimed in with the same responses.  I was about to say "in my experience it's women who think they can hold the relationship to ransom to get what they want" but actually, it's never happened to me.  And I actually can't think of an example where that has happened to anyone I know.  So it's my own subconscious gender bias (with some steering by the OP) that brought me to that conclusion - so I guess I can genuinely thank El Gecko for bringing that bias to my attention.

The amount of disrespect (made jokingly or otherwise) shown by a female to a male in the OP is IMO way above the amount of disrespect (largely I suspect made jokingly) by males to females in the responding posts purely because this is a male-dominated forum otherwise in a larger 50:50 split group I would expect to see at least some females making the same comments as well means the attack against the responders smells of virtue signalling.  While some of the comments may well have been a little sexist and could be offensive if taken out of context, this has been a one-sided attack against people having some mostly-harmless fun.

However - this is actually the second incident of this nature that I've seen this year - and I don't recall seeing anything of the sort in the nearly 15 years I've been here (apart from some possible upset on one of the Conrad threads, but of course that's bound to happen when you have a photo of such an awesomely powerful motor on the screen - people can't be held responsible for their own actions in those situations).  Most of the world is under some form of social restrictions, many of us haven't seen our friends or families on months, haven't properly exercised, haven't played sports or got out our competitive spirit.  We haven't seen much new comedy, because, well, nobody knows how to make a joke about it.  We're angry, anxious and afraid, and all the outlets that the mental health professionals have tried to steer us towards for the past five decades are now closed to us #becausepandemic.  It's no wonder we're all fraying at the edges and getting a little cheesed off with each other, even here.  Hey, me and my wife even fell out two weeks ago - for an hour.  And that almost never happens.

So maybe it's time to sit back, cool off, breathe the air and be thankful it's free of viral spores, and remember that we came here to talk about toy cars, and people who get angry while talking about toy cars are, well, a bit silly, really.

At least, that's what I tell myself every time I get angry while talking about toy cars

  • Like 5
  • Thanks 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
15 minutes ago, simalarion said:

Hmm ok ElGecko time to move on now?

Trying to kick me out too? You wish. This is a great look for the forum, keep going.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
14 minutes ago, Mad Ax said:

mostly-harmless fun.

It's only "mostly-harmless" to the people making the jokes.

It all contributes to general negativity in the world, and as you've said, we could all do with less of that these days.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Just now, El Gecko said:

Trying to kick me out too? You wish.

 

Just now, El Gecko said:

Trying to kick me out too? You wish.

No mate!, as stated several times, if you do not like this thread move to another one... no hard feelings ok

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

 

3 minutes ago, El Gecko said:

It's only "mostly-harmless" to the people making the jokes.

It all contributes to general negativity in the world, and as you've said, we could all do with less of that these days.

Well of course this is true, but I'm not seeing any direct evidence of the harm you seem to find at the point at which you fired the opening salvo, nor much in the way of general sweeping statements at all.  I'm seeing some general sexism (women like shoes, women do the cooking) which maybe isn't OK, in the same way that general racist statements aren't OK, but they've been balanced with "my wife likes practical shoes" and "I'm male and I do the cooking".

I am seeing some genuine non-comical non-offensive posts that speak specifically of specific women (rather than women generally) not enjoying a conversation about RC cars, and I'm seeing responses from men who have been in the sort of toxic relationship that was being joked about in the OP who have made specific references to the specific women in those relationships.  I am seeing some hypothetical responses to the hypothetical situation of having one's relationship ransomed over a toy car.

Let's be honest, your responses here don't seem to have had the desired effect and there's now an awful lot more negativity in this small corner of the forum than there was before.

  • Like 4
  • Thanks 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
20 minutes ago, El Gecko said:

It all contributes to general negativity in the world, and as you've said, we could all do with less of that these days.

Is this what You really try to  do now, contribute to less negativity in the world with over analysing obvious jokes and putting meaings in to it that does not exist and not stopping it either?. So i quote myself even though i hoped we could move on from this by now ...

 

"

I believe main problem is different countries and how humour is picked up, as British Humour is very simillar to Norwegian (probably becouse we learned to love British humour trough TV growing up), but also in this Social media times specially young ppl get very easy offended and not even on their behalf but  on others behalf, thats how political correct it can be on many forums today.

In this post i think its obvious that this was only meant as humour and yes i was just playing with words so there is no truth in it what so ever, it was ment as a relief in this covid-19 times. And for the most i felt like this was cathed up straight away so i did not have to actully explain that, and since the base of this forum seems to be from U.K i thought it was safe, even for today standard when so many want to be offenden on behalf of others and also be 100% political correct at all time as i mentioned, so i still thougth this was safe and harmless. For my part i understood right away that all here just shared their own story with iaFunny twist and was also setting their story on the egde for the humor of it (often very British humour), i did not at any point think they where hostile to womens in general or wanted to keep females away from forum, on the other hand some stated that they liked to clean and Cook for themselfes so i read it more like they where independent now (and enjoy what before where looked as at "womens" work) and proud of it, and that is actually poilitical correct even for todays standard. 

My trye story is that my wife is a scientist with Phd (and so on) and work all the time, she have much more money then i have , she also do not care what i do with my money as long as i pay my part in this family ofc (so pretty much the same as dannymulder)... my true story is also dead boring

"

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
15 minutes ago, Mad Ax said:

 

Well of course this is true, but I'm not seeing any direct evidence of the harm you seem to find at the point at which you fired the opening salvo, nor much in the way of general sweeping statements at all.  I'm seeing some general sexism (women like shoes, women do the cooking) which maybe isn't OK, in the same way that general racist statements aren't OK, but they've been balanced with "my wife likes practical shoes" and "I'm male and I do the cooking".

I am seeing some genuine non-comical non-offensive posts that speak specifically of specific women (rather than women generally) not enjoying a conversation about RC cars, and I'm seeing responses from men who have been in the sort of toxic relationship that was being joked about in the OP who have made specific references to the specific women in those relationships.  I am seeing some hypothetical responses to the hypothetical situation of having one's relationship ransomed over a toy car.

Let's be honest, your responses here don't seem to have had the desired effect and there's now an awful lot more negativity in this small corner of the forum than there was before.

Sexism is something men excel at ¯\(°_o)/¯ We could all stand to do better.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 minutes ago, OCD said:

Sexism is something men excel at ¯\(°_o)/¯ We could all stand to do better.

ISWYDT ;)

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ok, so firstly, I too would like to thank you @El Gecko as you've made me think about how I come across in type and how it can be interpreted. As I said, I would never intentionally be sexist, racist or derogatory to anyone, especially in an open forum. So the fact I appeared to be and you pulled me up on that has made me be a lot more mindful, so genuinely, thank you for highlighting this to me.

For me, I think two things have happened here. I do believe the OP made his comment in jest - if I had thought otherwise I would have been right there with you @El Gecko and told him it was inappropriate. I certainly wouldn't have added to it. Taking it to be light-hearted, I thought I'd share (in my mind at the time - but now I see it was possibly not correct to do so) a little anecdote of a common back and forth me and my wife have. Just to clarify on that anecdote - it has never resulted in an argument as I tried to point out in my later post, and I certainly never meant to sound like I was "bashing" my wife. 

The other thing that happened is that some others added in their comments about their personal experiences with divorce and separation. Now, I'm sure a lot of people have some very strong and painful experiences in that regard and I think it's understandable that they have powerful reactions to the outcomes of that. None of us know the circumstances behind those situations and none of us need to know. Those people are entitled to express those feelings, and I think in those circumstances, as we don't know what happened, we have to give them a little latitude. 

But I think a very good point has been made - we do need to be mindful of thinking before hit "post."

That said, I think that we've all learned something from this - which is a very positive thing. One thing that isn't positive is to criticise and accuse people. It's great to educate someone so that they are more mindful for next time a similar situation arises. However, being derogatory to them tends to just make people dig in and bite back because it causes them to feel hurt. As I said, without knowing everyone's personal experiences we can't say why they feel the way we do, so we need to exercise restraint in criticising them, especially publicly. If something they say really worries you - send them a PM and ask them why they said that - then you can determine how best to take the matter further.

One more thing I would add is that I've been on this forum for several years and have made some real good friends through it - along with that a lot of enjoyment, education and fun. Some comments I agree with, some I don't - we are all unique, there will never be another you or me - that's what makes the world such a varied place. We are all dealing with something - now more than ever. We all have bad days, make bad decisions or say the wrong thing. If we were knocked down by everyone each time we did the world would be an even worse place than it is. If we move past it, even after making our point, and do our best to help and be friendly to each other we will all feel a little better. I know I have personally received such support from people here, and I think you will too @El Gecko, so I really hope you continue to stay here and enjoy it.

 

 

  • Like 5

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
8 hours ago, jonboy1 said:

Agreed :)

So, in other news, I've just spent over £100 in about 10 minutes on vintage parts to make one of my shelf queens ever so slightly box fresh looking....:rolleyes::P

At least parts are easier to sell to the missus as “cheap” whereas a massive box screams “expensive”

haha

  • Haha 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
33 minutes ago, jonboy1 said:

Ok, so firstly, I too would like to thank you @El Gecko as you've made me think about how I come across in type and how it can be interpreted. As I said, I would never intentionally be sexist, racist or derogatory to anyone, especially in an open forum. So the fact I appeared to be and you pulled me up on that has made me be a lot more mindful, so genuinely, thank you for highlighting this to me.

For me, I think two things have happened here. I do believe the OP made his comment in jest - if I had thought otherwise I would have been right there with you @El Gecko and told him it was inappropriate. I certainly wouldn't have added to it. Taking it to be light-hearted, I thought I'd share (in my mind at the time - but now I see it was possibly not correct to do so) a little anecdote of a common back and forth me and my wife have. Just to clarify on that anecdote - it has never resulted in an argument as I tried to point out in my later post, and I certainly never meant to sound like I was "bashing" my wife. 

The other thing that happened is that some others added in their comments about their personal experiences with divorce and separation. Now, I'm sure a lot of people have some very strong and painful experiences in that regard and I think it's understandable that they have powerful reactions to the outcomes of that. None of us know the circumstances behind those situations and none of us need to know. Those people are entitled to express those feelings, and I think in those circumstances, as we don't know what happened, we have to give them a little latitude. 

But I think a very good point has been made - we do need to be mindful of thinking before hit "post."

That said, I think that we've all learned something from this - which is a very positive thing. One thing that isn't positive is to criticise and accuse people. It's great to educate someone so that they are more mindful for next time a similar situation arises. However, being derogatory to them tends to just make people dig in and bite back because it causes them to feel hurt. As I said, without knowing everyone's personal experiences we can't say why they feel the way we do, so we need to exercise restraint in criticising them, especially publicly. If something they say really worries you - send them a PM and ask them why they said that - then you can determine how best to take the matter further.

One more thing I would add is that I've been on this forum for several years and have made some real good friends through it - along with that a lot of enjoyment, education and fun. Some comments I agree with, some I don't - we are all unique, there will never be another you or me - that's what makes the world such a varied place. We are all dealing with something - now more than ever. We all have bad days, make bad decisions or say the wrong thing. If we were knocked down by everyone each time we did the world would be an even worse place than it is. If we move past it, even after making our point, and do our best to help and be friendly to each other we will all feel a little better. I know I have personally received such support from people here, and I think you will too @El Gecko, so I really hope you continue to stay here and enjoy it.

 

 

I like this post and think it gets the balance about right.

I've arrived late, but I too would like to thank @El Gecko, and lend my support to their views. Perhaps you've got a little too heated, but I can can totally see why. Good to see this is now dealing down again.

I've been here a few years and seen a lot of jokes, but never seen something that felt as broad or insensitive and some of the things on this thread. Lots of things here are clearly in jest or are specifically about one person rather than half the population. That's all fine. The line is a delicate one, but I feel that criticising ALL WOMEN in a joke is only OK if it quite clearly results in the audience appreciating that labelling all women (or all anything) is SUPER DUMB – that the joke is on the NARRATOR. If you don't get that across then you're the wrong side of that line, and it's either a bad joke or a bad message. I suppose some people are really OK with holding those views, but I doubt many people are, and I suspect NO-ONE on this board really falls into that category. Personal experiences can make us all lash out, but the real view can be quite different. And once we all starting getting defensive we dig our own holes.

So I'd like to encourage @El Gecko to keep posting on these boards and not give up hope. "All women are awful" is just a front, but I think you ruffled some feathers by picking people up on it, and it's easier for the accused to lash out rather question their actions. And in line with @jonboy1 I'm trying not to accuse anyone of anything other than "coming across a bit wrong", which happens to all of us, and which we should all be proud to walk back a little – in public or in private – when we've cooled down. For me, that's pretty much a daily event. I may have to do it again in a moment :-)

Might just add that as a English person, and someone who very much enjoys comedy, I do find the implication that UK citizens should get a pass on sexism a bit steep. There is a way to tell a joke ABOUT sexism or racism without it being offensive, and I think THAT'S what we're pretty good at. But 'British people are all about jokes based on prejudice' is not something that is true, or sends a very good signal about our country. This might just be my reading of some of the comment, so sorry if that wasn't't the intention. But it did shock me a bit, and I think, like @El Gecko, that we should all be conscious of whether making shocking comments in public forums is really that helpful.

Anyway, hoping this all cools down and the mods don't have to break out the thread lock!

Lot of love to everyone.

 

  • Like 1
  • Thanks 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Bwaaatch- Its no problem at all that he pointed that out to me but when explaining over and over that that was not the intetion at all, and is quite clearly not even a true story as i also now stated several times, so then i do not se the point on grinding it over and over, and as i also wrote earlier i was aware that this could happen as i am aware that many  (often) young ppl today on social media and forums are very political correct and also get very easaliy offended also on other behalfs, also i think my joke is very British humour so it probably did not fell in his taste, well quite clearly id did not .. Again i just wanted a litle cheap RC Joke in this tedious Corona times, i thought it was funny

In Real Life i have 4 Girls in the apartment (well 1 is 18 and out) my wife has a far better jobb than me so as long as i pay my part in the house she does not care what i do with my money, also my plan is to get the girils hooked on RC cars, no luck so far, but my Wife actually enjoyed driving Top-Force this weekend så maybe i should buy here an Egress hehe, talking abourt expenisve boxes @Problemchild

Edit:

"Anyway, hoping this all cools down and the mods don't have to break out the thread lock!"

ohh i liked that one, never thought of it before, clever.

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ive been through all three pages so far several times and I cant really see which posts have been offensive or critical of women as whole other than a couple of anecdotes based on peoples personal experience of not being in particularly great relationships and being better off out of them.

Isnt the original joke just a similar play on the "heres one, take my wife......no go on, take her" (but imagine it in black country accent in a smokey club in the 70s)

Unless my unconsious bias and inner misogyny is preventing me from seeing it.

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think I need to go reassess my life, society and the world 

when there are people out there denying covid,  refusing to wear masks, stating vaccines are dangerous, that the USA elections were rigged, that the earth is flat yet some humour and some actual fact is seen as the worst thing on the internet then I’m lost

ive deleted all my comedy series links 

in fact im never watching tv again and just turned off dead pixels because of its generalisations about gamers :( don’t want to upset them.

life has defo changed overnight 

JJ

  • Sad 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
13 minutes ago, Superluminal said:

 

Isnt the original joke just a similar play on the "heres one, take my wife......no go on, take her" (but imagine it in black country accent in a smokey club in the 70s)

 

I am not quite getting what you are writing there. But the Joke is a play with words, Wife say i will leave you if you buy 1 kit more, ok then it must be  very safe to buy 3 right (the answear should be obvious)... Ofc itst not, that was the intentention, did not think i had to explain it :).

Edit:So in this joke the "Man" in the Joke think he would keep his wife for sure it he bought 3 ... When i think off  it now maybe i should just explained the joke right away when this started yesterday, i thought it was so obvious, maybe its not. 

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

×
×
  • Create New...